Sunday, February 19, 2006

Long weekend

A brief update of what has been happening....

I flew to S.F. for a test/interview with U.S. postal inspection service. I didn't make it, but I did get a day of free tour of the city on the postal inspection service! I walked to Fisherman's Wharf, Chinatown, parts in-between, and ate some good dim-sums. I used to want that job a lot, but not as much as I thought I had. There were 5 people there taking the test, including myself, and they were all people in their late 20's, early 30's, and really bright, achievement orientated, and dull as can be. There was a guy who is a ATF agent who wouldn't stop talking about the details of getting a federal job, and to a point, it got a kind of irritating. He meant well, but cared a tad bit too much about the job. There was a woman prosecutor from NYC who just about walked out of the test after she found out that she would actually be making less as a postal inspector. I had no idea whether or not they had all gotten the job, but even if they did, it would probably be at least 4-6 months before they'd hear from the postal inspectors again. I hope that they got that job, and I hope that there'll be something better for me somewhere down the line.

This weekend is a long weekend, the cool thing about being a soldier is that there are some holidays that only soldiers and federal employees get off on, and for soldiers, they're called training holidays. Soliders who are not fighting are supposedly always in training for when they will be going to war. The GF and I went to Harrah's casino, and donated some $ for the state of Missouri, ate a complimentary buffet, and I cursed at our bad luck so far at winning. The weekend wasn't all lost, we did the laundry and put in some time on the stationery bikes.

Now to go back just a bit in time, about the night after I got back from S.F.... We went to dinner at this upper-medium scaled steak place to celebrate the end of a promotion exam for someone from my office. For starters, her and I sort of get along, but that's about it. I mean, she's a nice person and all, but her personality is so strong that I simply choose not to bother any further than the minor details of life. The GF is not that keen on her, both of them have strong opinions on things and for that reason, discussions can be a bit peppered. Last but not least, the friend who, for a while, was working out with me, but not any more. Either I... a. Gave her strange vibes, or b. She got sick of me. c. She just got lazy, or d. Who really knows? Recently, a string of brush-offs to the GF by her has given both me and the GF strange vibes about her. Even though we all are still friends, it's not like either of us felt comfortable enough with asking her what's going on. She might not feel that anything strange is going on, so if you ask her, you might get one of these "making issues out of nothing" responses, and you'll end up feeling a kind of stupid as a result.

Anyway, at dinner, I was tired and not participating much in any of the 3 conversations going on at the table, and the GF was feeling and showing the weirdness of not liking the gal who had just taken her promotion exam, and how the friend didn't even really say hi to her. Feeling tired and all, I wonder why I even bothered coming to that particular dinner gathering.

Later on the next day, I caught a friend of mine from college online and chatted with her for a little while. While it was great to have chatted with her, I felt that we've drifted so far apart in the last 10 years and that, for some reasons, was making me feel old, dull, and somewhat of a loser. In my 33 years of life so far, I've met a lot of people, but no matter how I've tried, rarely made lasting friendships.

Then a few days later, on Sat. morning, I got a call from someone that I did not expect to hear from. When I first arrived at the place I am now working at, this short, balding sgt. helped me get settled here and introduced me to everyone in the office. He was a little bit weird but only in a geeky kind of way. Anyway, he got deployed to go to Iraq about 6 months ago, and I got a call from him on the 1st. day of his mid-tour leave. We chatted for a while, about what his life was like at his camp in Iraq, how many times did they get mortared, and I told him about some of the personnel happenings at the office. We're not the best of friends but we do get along. The point is that, just when you think all is lost, then you get a little sign of assurance that you just might not be as bad as you once thought you were.

I don't think that I'm one of those self-assured person, can't even pretend to look that way. As much as I enjoy friendships, I can't stand to interact with large crowds. I don't even know if I am moving on some kind of right direction in life... and if I'll be good for my GF...

...but I'm trying.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

To Mr. Coleman....

I just wanted to thank you for the e-mail, and that rest assured, Bradli has managed to make more of a contribution and having been a positive force in his short life than a lot of other peoples' lives.
So, thanks again.


Saturday, February 04, 2006

I am a....

Tri-Lamb Material
56 % Nerd, 39% Geek, 52% Dork
For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in Nerd and Dork, earning you the coveted title of: Tri-Lamb Material.

The classic, "80's" nerd, you are what most people think of when they think "nerd," largely due to 80's movies like Revenge of the Nerds and TV shows like Head of the Class. You're exceptionally bright and smart, and partly because of that have never quite fit in with your peers or social groups. Perhaps you've realized, or will someday, that it is possible to retain all of the things that you like about being brilliant and still make peace with the social cliques around you. Or maybe you won't--it's really not necessary. As the brothers of Lambda Lambda Lambda discovered, you're fine just the way you are and can take pride in that. I mean, who wants to be like Ogre, right!?


Thursday, February 02, 2006


I got a copy of a order for me to attend the reserves civil affairs reclassifications course in Ft. Dix, NJ, leaving in about a week. This was done after the people at the reserve unit that I was at told me to goto the course, then turned around and told me not to goto the course because I did not pass my physical fitness test. (Missed the 2 mile run time by a minute.)

I felt rushed and confused.... and that's not a good sign.

You see, I went to a drill at that unit, wanting to know whether or not it'll be a good unit for me to attend drills at. Once I got there, I found myself in a inspection by the colonel of the brigade, then door guard, and endured a PT test in the freezing wind. No one wanted to see my records or tell me what the unit is about. Officers were sitting around doing nothing, and the enlisted were running around with no real missions. The only folks that I got to talk with was this young private who was really neat to talk to because he was also deployed to Iraq but doesn't yet have that battle-hardened perspective. There was also a 52 year old sargeant who could not stop talking about the military and how he's doing his part for the country by sending his kids into the military, and last but not least, a skinny, 35 year old guy who is leaving behind his life as a computer programmer and going to attempt to join the special forces. For a guy with such ambition, he was not acting gung-ho at all. I felt especially sorry for this older woman specialist, who, despite losing her husband to deployment (she was the one deployed), still is willing to let her unit step all over her.

I guess not having attended weekend drills for a year, it has become a pain in the ass again.

On what could be a positive note, I got a call back from the postal inspection service to do another job test/interview with them on Valentine's day! In San Francisco, of all places. I hope that I'll do well this time around. It would be a really cool job to have, even if it'll be a long process even after you pass the interview process.

Also, I'd like to say that my dog is the cutest dog in the world. The GF said that he's liking me better now... well, I sure hope so!

Congratulations to the GF, who is now a full-fledged phlebotomist! Soon, she'll be making some $$! (Translation: More tasty snacks!)